Virginia Protests Loss to Syracuse Over Maz Kanata
CHARLOTTESVILLE, VA — Men’s No. 1 seed Virginia, still reeling over their loss to No. 10 seed Syracuse, has contacted the NCAA to protest the upset. In reviewing video replays of the game, Virginia head coach Tony Bennett claims the Syracuse Orange had some outside help in the form of 900-year old Force mystic Maz Kanata, who sat front row for the game.
“Whenever she closed her eyes, we’d turn over the ball,” said Bennett. The coach also alleges Kanata would purposely change the lenses on her glasses to make distracting googly eyes at his players whenever they were attempting free throws. Kanata, who is dating Syracuse freshman guard Malachi Richardson, denies the allegations.
The Orange superfan issued a joint statement with the team’s head coach Jim Boeheim:
“Virgina’s claims are baseless as their resounding defeat had been predicted years ago via Forceback. But that is a story for another time.”
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