Exclusive! George Lucas’s 2016 Presidential Campaign Promises
Over the weekend we recieved this e-mail from a regular reader that shed some light on George Lucas’s presidential campaign which we previously announced early last week. After the jump see what Uncle George is promising to the masses.
To my dear friends at Faking Star Wars,
I can not divulge who I am, but I can you tell I work very closely with George and his campaign for presidency in 2016.It was during a private conference with his staff that he declared some of his plans once he is seated in the Oval Office.
- The first plan he intends to enact is a revision of the Declaration of Independence, with improved paper and ink, adding a few paragraphs and rewording a few lines to better fit what the Founding Fathers had intended.
- Outlaw anything Star Trek, i.e, TV shows, the movies, comics, video games, board games, and conventions.
- Move the Capitol to Skywalker Ranch, because “They are more creative there. I like genuine creativity, not Suits yakking up nonsense.”
- Revamp the US military with X-wings instead of F-22’s. His statement: “Yeah, I know making a single X-wing will cost more than $37 Billion, but it will more imposing than what everybody else has. Also, merchandise!”
- And finally, every household will have a set of the Complete Star Wars Saga. [Sequel Trilogy and spin-offs TBD]
Yours truly,Slartiblartfast
Sounds good to us! Uncle George if you’re reading, you have Faking Star Wars’ vote!
