Top 10 Reasons John Boyega Cried While Reading The Force Awakens Script

September 30, 2015 "Faking" Jacen Solo

It appears Star Wars: The Force Awakens has reduced yet another grown man to crybaby status. And this time, it’s someone important. (Sorry, Kevin Smith. We’ll mail you a jersey!) John Boyega, one of the leads of the sequel trilogy, recently admitted to tearing up after reading the script to the upcoming Star Wars film. He didn’t say why, but that’s not stopping us from saying why! After the jump, we push back the tears and share the top 10 reasons JB (we’re penpals) went all misty eyed over the TFA script.

10. JJ Abrams and Lawrence “Larry Larr” Kasdan referred to him as Peanut throughout the script

09. Snoke was revealed to be Darth Plagueis, which settled a long-running debate on John’s favorite messageboard, and proved him wrong. Dead wrong. “I! Don’t! Know! How! To! Eat! Crow!”

08. Luke Skywalker was only featured on the last page of the script… in a scene where he scolds Finn for eating one too many Grunburgers

07. Finn’s last name is revealed to be Gerlickin.

06. After 324 pages of detailed Senate hearings and 655 pages dedicated to the misadventures of JoJo Binks, John realized he was reading George Lucas’ outline for a new ennealogy, and would have to start on page 1 of the actual script.

05. Papercut.

04. Act 3’s big revelation triggered a catastrophic asthma attack in John, leaving him gasping for breath in a puddle of tears. Onlookers say he looked like “the goldfish from that Faith No More video.”

03. Daisy Ridley and her sister Kika were practicing yoga just a few feet away from him.

02. Someone doodled a very offensive yet somewhat accurate sketch of Adam Driver in slave Leia outfit and Lena Dunham as Jabba within the margins of the page featuring the flashback scene.

01. The even pages of the script were printed on copy-proof red paper with black light font written in reverse Aurebesh, while the odd pages contained a series of QR codes that revealed augmented reality “mystery boxes” which may or may not contain the real-world GPS coordinates of where that one specific page was buried.

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