The Brother & Sister You Never Saw Coming!

Most nerds are willing to bet that Rey and Kylo Ren are the offspring of Han Solo and Leia Skywalker. But that wouldn’t be all that original, now would it? Thinly veiled rewrites of non-canon Expanded Universe characters Jacen and Jaina Solo is what a hack would write for the screen. And we all know JJ Abrams is no hack, right? Not sure? Well, our latest scoop proves he’s no hack, as the siblings of Star Wars: The Force Awakens are an inspired and wholly unexpected pair. Read on to discover which two characters are related by more than just mo-cap.

Before the big reveal, we must bore you with a bit of backstory. Bear with us. During The Clone Wars “Mortis Trilogy” we learn of a family of immensely powerful Force users known as The Ones. Daddy One was their leader (Damn Patriarchy!) and somewhat balanced in The Force. Meanwhile the Son and Daughter were on opposite sides of the spectrum: Junior being dark side, and little miss thang being a manifestation of the light side. (This trio basically created The Force, but I won’t bore with that… go watch the cartoons!)

Long story short: Father-san brings Anakin Skywalker over to their homeworld of Mortis to check if the young Jedi is indeed The Chosen One, Son flips out and tries to kill his Dad, Daughter blocks the fatal blow and sacrifices her life in order to save Papa-san, Son tries to kill Father again, but Father kills himself first, which leaves the Son weak, at which point Anakin kills him. It’s much more uplifting than this. The colors and CG really add some humanity to it all.

Now that you know that… let’s get to the juicy scoop.

Snoke & Maz Kanata Are Brother & Sister
According to canon, only the Father disappeared into The Force upon death, but a source very close to the production of the mini-posters inside The Force Awakens soundtrack CD has revealed Brother and Sister also survived… only they’re now very damaged. “Been through a lot” is how our Bothan spy put it.

“There Has Been An Awakening”
He also mentioned that Brother and Sister awakening in new physical forms is what the title of the film is primarily referring to. Because they are Force opposites, their new bodies also exhibit an extreme difference. Supreme Commander Snoke (Brother) was reborn as an enormously tall figure with a liquid silvery skin. Think 14-foot tall Tyra Banks with additional 3 feet of five-head… but male. For reference, our source included an image of a canonical being that shares a slight resemblance to Snoke’s final form: the Quermian Jedi Master Yarael Poof.

Snoke’s facial area changes according to his mood and whether or not any midichlorians are in proximity. He needs to be near The Force in some capacity or he becomes inert, and gravely ill. Rey, Finn, Poe, and Kylo represent batteries to him, Force vessels he can sponge off. Of course, they are morsels in comparison to Snoke’s Holy Grail of Force Feeding: Luke Skywalker.

As for Sister, she has been awakened in a small body. You can see her in the official poster for The Force Awakens as well as a recently leaked Lego mini-figure. She is orange-ish with big all-knowing eyes. Maz Kanata (Sister) also needs to be near Force-sensitives in order to use some of her own gifts, such as telekinesis and Force visions.

The Eyes Have It
Both Brother and Sister’s new physical forms have unique Force abilities tied to their eyes. Supreme Commander Snoke (Brother) can shoot Sith lightning directly from his glare, while Maz (Sister) can see view Force visions of anyone she looks at.

Extreme Sibling Rivalry
Snoke (Brother) and Maz (Sister) are in a race to find Jedi Master Luke Skywalker. Luke represents the single largest midichlorian source in the universe. He is the fuel needed in order for The Ones to become one with The Force and crossover like their Father. Maz hopes to crossover first in order to warn her Father and protect him again if need be from her Brother, Snoke.

That’s a far cry from Rey and Kylo are Jacen and Jaina. But what do you think? Is our source blowing snoke up our bums or is he the real deal? Who do you think is related in Star Wars: The Force Awakens? (7 years of bad luck to any mook who ironically says Luke and Leia) Let us know in the comments section!