Fake NewsSequel TrilogyThe Force Awakens

Exclusive: Disney Shifts The Force Awakens Release Date

 

star-wars-7-620x300

No doubt you’ve been seeing the Star Wars release date counters all over Twitter, Instagram, and Facebook the last few days.  Well, it may be time to reset those clocks according to our latest scoop.  Read on after the jump to find out what’s happening with the official Force Awakens release date. 

This morning, Disney, Lucasfilm, and Bad Robot came together to issue a statement regarding the release date of Star Wars: The Force Awakens. This is an excerpt from that press event earlier today.

“We would like apologize to fans everywhere regarding their hopes for the release of the new film this December 18th, 2015. We made an itsy-bitsy teenie-weenie little clerical error that we would like to now correct. The film actually isn’t going to be in theaters until NEXT year, December 2016.”

Fans may be puzzled how such a massive oversight could occur.  It turns out that in the early production days, director JJ Abrams was chatting on his flip-phone to Disney CEO Bob Iger. Turns out Abrams likes his phone how he likes his films – practical. “I just like the feeling of the buttons on my fingers as I text,” he explained.  Unfortunately, the “6” key on Abrams’ phone was all worn out, so he just hit the “5” key instead. The whole text reads “Bobby bb, TFA DEC 18 2015 +1.” Apparently Iger assumed that by “+1”, Abrams meant he would be allowed to see it with his wife on opening day.

IMG_7006.JPG

“I’m very embarrassed with myself,” said Iger. “I mean, I should have double checked with JJ after he sent that message to me before I ordered a multi-million dollar marketing campaign around the release of the film for the wrong year. I just get invited to a lot of events, so I’m always wondering how many guests I can bring. It made sense at the time. Now I’m just really devastated for all these fans who will have to wait.”

The twittersphere has gone crazy with fans retweeting the following image at record levels.

 

IMG_7004.JPG

Jay Vard, a lifetime Star Wars fan, explained to FakingStarWars, “I can’t believe I didn’t even look at the date on my tickets.  This is going to be a really, really long year.  Bummer. Guess I’ll drown my sorrows in jelly donuts and pizza. Thanks for nothing, Disney!”

For more info on how this news will affect the release schedule for the remaining Star Wars films that are in pre-production, keep it locked to FakingStarWars.net for the latest updates.

Liked it? Take a second to support Faking Star Wars on Patreon!
Become a patron at Patreon!

Storm Duper

Trained in a variety of galactic codes and languages, Storm Duper fancies himself the Resistance’s best chance to destroy the First Order’s vile hold on leaks and news regarding the new franchise of films. In self-imposed exile from his home on Jakku, Storm Duper has taken to going under cover on reconnaissance missions and reporting all the latest true fake news on the Faking Star Wars Radio podcast. Follow him on Twitter, @StormDuper.

Social media & sharing icons powered by UltimatelySocial