From Step Brothers to Lovers? Finn & Poe in Episode VIII
We’re getting conflicting reports this morning regarding where the hottest bromance in the galaxy is headed in Star Wars: Episode VIII. Last night a source divulged how Poe’s family would be adopting former stormtrooper-turned-hero Finn. This morning, however, John Boyega posted a peculiar image on his Instagram, which seems to corroborate what a second source has been carelessly whispering in our ears. Apparently the bromance will be stepping it up a notch and breaking new ground in the highly anticipated sequel to The Force Awakens. Keep reading to see how Finn and Poe could be the real power couple of the Sequel Trilogy. Don’t worry, Rey fans. She is a helluva wingwoman.
Are the step brothers steeping it up and entering into the first gay relationship in a Star Wars film? It seems likely given the following report sent into us by a source calling himself “Magical Michael”:
Referencing a recent Twitter video of him working out while Oscar Isaac watches, Boyega explained, “What’s so funny, I posted a video the other day of myself working out, skipping, and in the background Oscar is just like, ‘Yeah baby go on!’ and people just went crazy.” Boyega doesn’t know if those enthusiastic shippers will find what they’re looking for in Episode VIII, but he also wouldn’t put it past the franchise:
“But as far as I’m concerned, when J.J. [Abrams] sat us down to go through the script, it was a bromance. But now I’m learning what Mark Hamill said before when he didn’t know that Darth Vader was Luke’s father: you never know what they’re going to pull. I’m looking at the director Rian [Johnson] closely so he can get me involved early, so I can prepare myself. But both Oscar and me would love the chance to bring gay representation to the Star Wars franchise. We’re already bros so it isn’t hard to take it one step further. So who knows?”
FSW was hesitant to run the story but then John Boyega posted another uber questionable image on his Instagram this morning. The 18th century style swashbuckling portrait features a dashing Finn and Poe standing next to each other. You can clearly see a lightsaber protruding from Finn’s pirate pants, and… SPOILER ALERT… it seems Poe inherits Han’s blaster, which is suggestively tucked into his white pantaloons. The pair seem to be on Tatooine as well. Either this is a bit of masterful trolling by Boyega, or it’s a calculated way for Disney to gauge fan reaction to a potential gay relationship in Star Wars.
We pressed “Magical Michael” for more details but he only confirmed that Poe and Finn will be an item, and Rey will remain entirely free of sexual desires. In fact, she helps set the bros up. “MM” also let us in on a doozy: Rey is sexless because she was made entirely of the Force, which has no need for sexual contact. He claims this is why Luke is “pretty much a eunuch” despite having shared a kiss with his sister in the Original Trilogy. This renders all Luke’s wife theories null and void. He never had one. He is a teacher, and Rey will be a student. Their love affairs are with the Force.
There you have it. Poe and Finn are set to make history in Episode VIII as the first openly gay characters in a gay relationship that is very gay-friendly and gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay. (Sorry, I got carried agay.)
Can you feel the conservatives getting butthurt already? Thanks go out to “Magical Michael” — please keep the scoops coming.
How do you feel about this development? Does this help broaden the appeal of Star Wars? Does this change how you expected the Sequel Trilogy to pan out? Let us know in the comments section or on our new messageboards!
-William Bobo
