Rian Johnson Writing Trilogy For Urban Dictionary
In a deal said to be worth less than zero, writer-director Rian Johnson will be creating an all-new trilogy for the Urban Dictionary streaming service. The first entry – a subversive definition of the name Rian Johnson — was soft launched by the company last night, and is already creating waves throughout fandom.
“I’m the last person you’d expect to trash myself, so naturally I had be the first to do it. I went in hard, too. Hopefully, my haters get a kick out of it, because there’s a whole lot more where that came from!”
Johnson’s exclusive three-definition deal was inked shortly after the director caused waves by defining the term “Zeroh’ed” — a snarky reference to missing the mark completely a la Mike Zeroh’s YouTube videos that feature endless inane Star Wars theories.
We’re told Johnson’s second installment will be even darker — but just as subversive. Rumors suggest Johnson may be defining Lucasfilm president Kathleen Kennedy or fellow Star Wars director J.J. Abrams.
“I can’t reveal too much, but suffice it to say I’m really excited to finally be working with Urban Dictionary. You have no idea how much I contributed to the site while bored at film school. Between that and Wikipedia bombing anything related to the Star Wars prequels, I gained a true appreciation for subverting people’s expectations.”
Of course, this being Rian Johnson, critics are already offended. His definition of “Rian Johnson” has been called “racist” “uninspired” and “subversive for subversive’s sake.” Lucasfilm Story Group’s Pablo Hidalgo — normally a huge Johnson supporter — described the project as misguided and “pandering to the worst of Star Wars fans.”
Despite the backlash, Johnson remained unfazed. “Urban Dictionary is giving me an unlimited budget and more emojis than you can possibly imagine… so people can say whatever, but Rian Johnson gonna Rian Johnson,” said the director before miming a mic drop.
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