A Day in the Life of Baby Yoda
Our newest feature at FSW has been a smash hit with regular readers (Hi, Mom). In case you’re unfamiliar, our “Day in the Life” series follows some of the most influential Star Wars creators, personalities, and characters to bring you a behind-the-scenes look at their daily lives. And up next is the galaxy’s current “It” baby — that’s right, the as-yet-unnamed child informally known as Baby Yoda.
FSW was given exclusive access to the adorable green tyke, and you won’t believe what the runaway star of The Mandalorian gets mixed up in on any given day. Hopefully, our story doesn’t get “The Child” into any trouble with daddy Din Djarin. So without further ado, we present to you A Day in the Life of Baby Yoda.
6:30am — Suck down 3 frogs and a blue milk for breakfast
7am — Use the Force to toss cats across the room
7:30am — Watch best parts of Gremlins and Gremlins 2
8:30am — Force Skype with Baby Yaddle and talk 50-year-old baby to each other
9am — Film scenes for The Rise of Skywalker: Director’s Cut
11am — Save the Mandalorian from imminent death
11:15am — Pose for promotional photos in Easter Bunny outfit
12pm — Approve packaging design for The Baby Yoda Fragrance: De Toilette, Eau
12:30pm — Perform motion-capture for Babu Frik
12:45pm — Suck on metal marbles until blue in face
1pm — Have entire body 3D-scanned for action figures
1:30pm — Eat “chicky nuggies” and choco milk for lunchy lunch
2:30pm — Provide scientists with cheek swabs, to be used in Baby Yoda toothpaste
3:30pm — Go for a ride in the dryer
4pm — Stare at Cara Dune’s dunes… then pretend to be looking at her eye tattoo
4:30pm — Smile to reassure Latin America that he is not the dreaded “El Nino”
4:45pm — Force heal the Mandalorian after sustaining grave injury
5pm — Attend rehearsals for Baby Yoda x Baby Shark music video collaboration
6pm — Save the Mandalorian from imminent death
6:30 — Suck down 3 frogs and a green milk for dinner
7pm — Create another finger painting for his memoir, 50 Years a Slave: My Life Under Disney
8pm — Bring the Mandalorian back to life after sustaining fatal injury
9pm — Change out of robe into something more comfortable
9:15 — Daddy Din Djarin reads Goodnight Death Star
9:15pm — Listen to Rockabye Baby! John Williams Edition
9:30pm — Sleepy sleep
Thank you to the “Clan of Two” for allowing us to tail Baby Yoda for the day. If there’s a Star Wars personality you’d love for us to shadow for 24 hours, hit us up on Twitter to let us know.
As always, stay tuned to FakingStarWars.net for all the finest Star Wars comedy, parody, and satire in the galaxy. Don’t forget to follow us on Twitter, Instagram and Facebook and subscribe to our podcast on iTunes or Google Play for even more unbelievable news from a galaxy far, far away. Also, consider supporting us on Patreon… for as little as a buck a month, you can help us fake harder, better, faster, stronger.
—William “Willybobo” Bobo
