Fake NewsFandom and Nerd LifeSequel TrilogyThe Force Awakens

Local Theater Already Sold Out of Star Wars: The Force Awakens Tickets

Even though ticket sales haven’t officially opened yet, a theater in northern Kentucky began selling tickets as early as 12:18 this morning. After the jump see what details we were able to get from the manager and what he anticipates for total sales.

Jacen’s cousin, who works for Rave Cinemas in Kalamazoo, Kentucky, was the one who let us know they had already began selling TFA tickets and are already sold out from the the December 17th early 7 pm showing all the way through January 1st’s 6:43 am show time.

The theater’s manager, Ned Biffs, gave the Faking Star Wars’s news team an exclusive interview, wherein he explained his thought process.

“I really don’t give a crap what Disney set up,” the manager told us. “I want the money the ticket sales ASAP so I opened sales at 12:18 this mornin’ to reflect the December 18th opening day. I can’t believe we sold out of tickets through New Year’s Day! Had I waited until after the halftime show during the Eagles and Giants game tonight, some other theaters would have stolen my ticket sales!”

Biffs then explained he will be showing the new full-length trailer earlier than the ESPN showing. He told us that if you show up at the theater around 6pm tonight and mention Faking Star Wars, you can get in to watch the trailer for a reduced ticket price of $15 rather than the full $25. Also Biffs will be raffling off a TFA prop used in the movie in the parking lot afterwards!

I believe Jacen’s cousin will also be working so if you see a Mexican kid with red hair, tell him you’re also Jacen’s cousin and he will let you in the back door for free.
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Link Voximilian

The artist known as Link Voximilian leads the parody department of FSW as the Head of Creative Content. He is an avid fan of Star Wars, Marvel, and Nintendo, a skilled musician, and an aspiring sci-fi/fantasy author. Aside from writing for the site, Link also dabbles in graphic design using MS Paint to create low-effort t-shirt designs. He currently resides in a double-wide, in the middle of nowhere on Corellia, building Lego sculptures, repairing guitars, and collecting way too many dark helmets and masks.

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