Spotify Drops Figrin D’an After Demanding Joe Rogan Be Removed
The galactically known singer/musician has issued an ultimatum to the streaming service because it hosts Joe Rogan, whom the mayor
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Sequel Trilogy
J.J. Abrams Files For Creative Bankruptcy
SANTA MONICA, CA—Writer-director-producer J.J. Abrams has filed for creative bankruptcy due to a severe bout of writer’s block. In Chapter
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Kylo Ren Burns Down Jedi Temple Challenge, Show Canceled
A Jedi temple masquerading as a game show was destroyed last night by Kylo Ren and his Knights of Ren.
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Armie Hammer: “Star Wars Is Curing My Cannibalism”
Disgraced actor Armie Hammer says he is well on his way to recovery thanks to Star Wars. If you recall,
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New Republic On High Alert For Bezos And Branson Spaceships
HANNA CITY, CHANDRILA—Earth’s space race between billionaires may seem like a harmless competition, but billions of light years away, leaders
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8 Problematic Star Wars Vehicles That Should Be Renamed
Earlier this week, Star Wars content creators were in a frenzy regarding a name change to Boba Fett’s spaceship. The
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Rey Drops ‘Skywalker’ After Luke’s Sith Journals Discovered
TATOOINE—Construction on the all-new “Skywalker Jedi Academy” has been halted after a moisture farmer unearthed controversial paraphernalia kept by the
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